This is a monologue I made about an event either in my life or about someone/something else. I did this in order to explore the topic 'Rites of Passage'. This was the topic that we had to base our films on. This task allowed me to really dig deep and think about the different feelings and possible ideas that surround this topic e.g. sadness.
Why oh why? God? God? No!No! Stop!
I was told once indeed I was told,
Bad things happenn to good people she said.
Only now do I realise ;now that I’m stuck in despair….
On this poisonous rite of passage
To love, to dream, to be,
Were once part of my future, but now are parts of my past.
Why is it so difficult to be like a plant in a field,
Moving freely where the wind takes it.
The life of flowers how I envy you.
Why must I be among humans,
when I can walk among the dead.
My life now; a bed!
Sitting silently waiting for a death that’s already half way there.
More pain comes to me day by day as I age,
Still in this position
half dead!
The worst part is feeling like there's no one to turn to,
no one who knows your pain around you
no one who could possibly feel your suffering
no one.........
There's no way out for me; just an empty black room
for my mind to return to
With the darkness comes loneliness
a road I must wallow in myself-
but
sometimes I can't help but wonder
what if it wasn't me
What if I had just missed it then where would I be
I would've finished Uni by now, maybe a family with kids
my whole life ahead of me
Why cant I be stronger! Sun give me strength!
Why won't you give me strength?
Now that my eyes are full of tears
I can only think of what could have been instead of being grateful for what is
I have lost the will to live if you can call it that
It's times like these when the secret question comes
Am I living If I feel like I'm dead?
Sun
you brought me into to this world
you bought me hear to suffer!
you laugh at me behind my back
you shin your evil rays to a place where I can't escape
Everything I touch burns
Everything I feel makes me even colder
Everything I see only strengthens my rage
4 years already
somewhere along the line I lost myself
I wish I had the guts to shake hands with death
a little bit sooner
Soon you'll forget me
Soon I'll forget me
I think even heavens forgotten me
Once you've walked with the devil for so long; how do you find your way back
Why won't you give me strength? When I have no strength of my own!
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